Don’t Like - Friends In Far Places

Guest post by Zi Zabalerio

Friends in far places… what a curse! It’s hard enough to make plans with a homie living in the same city for a weekday lunch or weekend hike, but finding the time to hang IRL with that friend across the country, or across the pond? Whether it’s a childhood friend, an old college roommate, or a close-friend-you-meet-right-before-they-move-away (as I am prone to), seeing them takes true intention, and even more follow through! They’re far enough that you visiting them or them visiting you often presents a wrench in everyone’s cadence. The plates start spinning long before the reunion: having to take time off work, walking the tightrope between doctor’s appointments, music lessons, and whatever else people fill their routines with. That said, I’ve done this long enough and with enough people that you can trust to find your frequency cycles organically: like my friend Jakub every 5 years (2019 in Spain, 2024 in Portugal), or Henry on an annual cycle (2021-present). The ineffable beauty of it is that we always pick up where we left off, and the inconvenience of spacetime melts right away with that first familiar hello. And guaranteed, there’s more than enough to catch up on.

(p.s. I’m writing this on a flight back from camping with my best friend Ethan, with whom I share a 6-month interval at the moment, alternating between him visiting me in Portland and me visiting him in Virginia. We still FaceTime or call each other every week, but it’s just not the same…)

(p.p.s If you have a guest post you’d like to share, please let me know!)